2013 beginnings.

I’ve hesitated writing goals in here for 2013, because I’m still trying to figure out what I want to accomplish.

Here’s something I haven’t really touched on very much in this blog — the past few years have been very, very difficult. I’ve gone through a divorce, a move halfway across the country, adjusting to life back in New England, my father’s accident, my mother’s diagnosis with MS, my parents’ separation, my father’s passing, and a few other minor things that pale in comparison to those I’ve listed but have still affected me. Since moving here almost 4 (!!) years ago, I’ve lived in 4 different apartments and have worked at 3 different companies. I’ve been at my current company for 2 years and have worked on 3 different teams and in 3 different office locations! I haven’t felt stability in my life since before my divorce in 2008.

I think, honestly, 2013 will be the year of stability. The past few years have left me, quite frankly, devastated, not sure what to do next, and I want to spend this year finding myself again, exploring my passions, and figuring out what I want to do for the rest of my life. I wanted to do many of these things in 2012, but my father’s passing took the wind out of my sails for the rest of the year. I never talked about my holidays because it was difficult this year, quite possibly the most difficult holiday season I’ve ever experienced. I just look forward to getting back on track with my life in 2013 and really, really hope that nothing awful’s coming around the corner for me or my family.

I’m hoping writing about this will really and truly help get past all this. I’ve let the bad things in my life drag me down for years and I’m ready to rise above it all, to live the life I’m meant to live, whatever THAT is.

My goals for this year? Less laziness, more motivation. Less sadness, more happiness. Less chaos, more stability.